There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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