Texts From Last Night

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  (707): View more from California

  Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.

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  (707): Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping. http://tfl.nu/7pjn
  Replies (47) Good night (3609) Bad night (1370)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)

  (1-775): View more from Nevada

  Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.

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  (775): I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;) (1-775): Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city. http://tfl.nu/zbb5
  Replies (14) Good night (4941) Bad night (812)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'

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  (253): Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin' http://tfl.nu/fw6c
  Replies (37) Good night (6433) Bad night (948)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.

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  (203): I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour. http://tfl.nu/xoad
  Replies (26) Good night (8372) Bad night (1117)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night

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  (831): It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night http://tfl.nu/8gcp
  Replies (13) Good night (6350) Bad night (1640)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong

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  (240): Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong http://tfl.nu/kgfp
  Replies (19) Good night (3734) Bad night (1734)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs

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  (443): also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs http://tfl.nu/bzfk
  Replies (3) Good night (2363) Bad night (982)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?

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  (828): If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me? http://tfl.nu/3q2x
  Replies (5) Good night (2543) Bad night (915)
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  (909): View more from California

  and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....

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  (909): and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests".... http://tfl.nu/4e7u
  Replies (7) Good night (3689) Bad night (963)
• Favorite

  (+41): View more from Switzerland

  How did she break his doorknob?

  (1+41): View more from

  That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.

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  (+41): How did she break his doorknob? (1+41): That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought. http://tfl.nu/2qqq
  Replies (4) Good night (1880) Bad night (592)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.

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  (724): I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed. http://tfl.nu/6i3f
  Replies (4) Good night (1221) Bad night (551)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.

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  (406): He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die. http://tfl.nu/b33e
  Replies (3) Good night (913) Bad night (616)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY

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  (574): LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY http://tfl.nu/e3an
  Replies (3) Good night (1072) Bad night (427)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high

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  (314): I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high http://tfl.nu/02c4
  Replies (2) Good night (893) Bad night (344)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap

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  (615): Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap http://tfl.nu/hboz
  Replies (0) Good night (445) Bad night (258)

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