Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
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So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
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If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.