thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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