strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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