PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
