Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize