Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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