I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
