Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize