Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
