i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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