If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I need to stop coming to work sober
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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