I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize