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• (917): View more from New York City

  last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks

  (917): View more from New York City

  this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed

  (917): View more from New York City

  he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?

  (718): View more from New York

  messed up. what color are the wings?

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• (650): View more from California

  hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.

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• (516): View more from New York

  There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.

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• (310): View more from California

  i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."

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  27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (716): View more from New York

  I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.

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• (207): View more from Maine

  Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.

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• (619): View more from California

  He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.

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  19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (801): View more from Utah

  New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."

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• (819): View more from Quebec

  I have grass duct taped all over my body

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.

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