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• (702): View more from Nevada

  I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds

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• (801): View more from Utah

  Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am

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• (206): View more from Washington

  No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.

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  The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.

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  19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.

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• (650): View more from California

  I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now

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• (510): View more from California

  Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?

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