Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize