U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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