Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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