Say something about gay babies.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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