when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
