I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Randomize
