We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
