Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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