Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?