nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
