im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
What a dumb baby whore.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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