I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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