Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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