He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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