I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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