And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
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