what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
