whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
