i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
