No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
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