So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
