whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
