best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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