also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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