So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
