My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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