I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize