hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize