Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize