You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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