Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
