The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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