problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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