Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
