College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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