Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
