Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
